Angels Among Us

On my birthday a sweet friend from our church called and asked if she could take Sammie and I out to lunch, but first she needed to run some errands and wanted our help. We happily agreed and met her at 10:30 that morning, looking forward to soaking up some joy from a Spirit-filled lady. We got in the car and she turned around with a big smile and said, “We’re not going to the school. We’re going shopping.” And she handed each of us an envelope full of money collected from many anonymous and loving people at our church.

I was so stunned I could hardly even react other than to gape open-mouthed. My previous post about a vacation gone awry explains why she, and many others, felt like doing something nice for us, as they knew we would need to replace the stuff that got chewed on or stolen. It’s been several days and I still can hardly accept how generous they’ve been to us. Such amazing love knocked me speechless. Truly, this has been the worst summer I’ve ever lived through but our family continues to be blessed. I can hardly begin to name all the acts of kindness and expressions of genuine love that have been bestowed on us, I only know that I’ll never be able to repay it all. It’s humbling.

Several times this summer I’ve complained about not having enough time to see all the people I love. There are so many people I wanted to see and hug, but was unable to. But as tears streamed down my face at least once a day, a few of them spoke not of pain—but of healing. It occurred to me that it’s a blessing that I have so many friends, I can’t see them all. So many precious people in my life make it worth opening my eyes every morning.

“I believe there are angels among us, sent down to us, from somewhere up above. They come to you and me—in our darkest hour; to show us how to live, teach us how to give, and guide us with a light of love.”
-Alabama

我的东西

Of all my possessions, very few would catch the eye of any potential thief. Most are monetarily virtually worthless. So, theoretically I shouldn't be terribly distressed if something happens to my material possessions...

Thursday evening before our much-anticipated trip to Colorado, I was at Target with Sammie and somehow managed to lose my car keys in the store. We searched for half an hour and eventually resigned ourselves to the knowledge that we were stranded, and ashamedly called my mom to have her rescue us. I wasn't remotely upset about the episode, knowing at the most it would cost me 2 hours and 5 dollars worth of headache. In the long-run, it wasn't a terrible setback.

Unfortunately that event seemed to set a minor precedent for the rest of the week. After a few blissful days in cathartic scenery with old friends, we set off for our first family outing. Sammie and I had high ambitions of climbing at least a few 14ers, if not the full 5 we set as a goal. Mount Princeton was the first objective inviting us into his lair. We camped along the folds of an eternal stream in the only mildly steep site we found that didn't threaten to eject us from the side of the mountain. Early the next morning we set out in pursuit of his elusive peak. Many excruciating hours, and a hail storm later we finally descended to the previous night's haven only to discover that all was not well in our camp. A bear had visited these trespasser's belongings sometime during the day, and destroyed several vital tools, while mysteriously leaving some intact. He ripped my pack to shreds, chewed my Bible beyond use, and wreaked havoc on tents, sleeping bags, etc.

A few more decent days passed, allowing us to laugh about the damage done by our bear friend, when catastrophe struck again. After spending the night with a cousin in Aurora, we packed our bag and hauled it outside to be loaded in the car. Went back inside to get the keys. Came back outside to a street, a vehicle, and no bag. Somebody who thinks they are getting a good steal is going to be kicking themselves when they realize that all they have is a junk bag full of dirty, nasty laundry, and toothbrushes and other utterly valueless yet necessary items. So Sammie and I had to go to Walmart in the middle of the night to try to find something besides a T-shirt and running shorts (literally the only thing I had left) to wear to our friend's wedding the next morning. I managed to get a skirt that wasn't quite falling off of me, and wore my chacos to the wedding.

Though I left with two full bags I returned home with almost nothing. I doubt seriously that anybody benefited more than a dollar for all the stuff they got, yet it was almost irreplaceable items for me. My Bible with all my notes--and bear slobber-- was among the missing, along with lots of other valueless yet special things. On the bright side my copy of 1984 now has teeth marks in it.

Renunciation of objects, without the renunciation of desires, is short-lived, however hard you may try.

-Nishkulunand

高山

He was born in the summer of his 27th year
Comin home to a place he'd never been before
He left yesterday behind him, you might say he was born again
You might say he found a key for every door

When he first came to the mountains his life was far away
On the road and hangin by a song
But the string's already broken and he doesn't really care
It keeps changin fast and it don't last for long

But the Colorado rocky mountain high
I've seen it rainin' fire in the skyThe shadow from the starlight is softer than a lullabye
Rocky mountain high

He climbed cathedral mountains, he saw silver clouds below
He saw everything as far as you can see
And they say that he got crazy once and he tried to touch the sun
And he lost a friend but kept his memory

Now he walks in quiet solitude the forest and the streams
Seeking grace in every step he takes
His sight has turned inside himself to try and understand
The serenity of a clear blue mountain lake
And the Colorado rocky mountain high
I've seen it rainin' fire in the sky
You can talk to God and listen to the casual reply
Rocky mountain high

Now his life is full of wonder but his heart still knows some fear
Of a simple thing he cannot comprehend
Why they try to tear the mountains down to bring in a couple more
More people, more scars upon the land
And the Colorado rocky mountain high
I've seen it rainin' fire in the sky
I know he'd be a poorer man if he never saw an eagle fly
Rocky mountain high

哥哥

Clifford somewhere in Thailand

In Egypt

Off the coast of India

It seems fitting that Pink Floyd provided the backdrop as I rounded the corner on 24^th where my brother lost his life.  If it hadn’t been for him I might never have learned to appreciate good music.  It was he who introduced me to The Wall, Led Zeppelin, some of the Beatles lesser-known masterpieces, and the Who.  I remember with painful clarity the first time he made me listen to Queen’s Greatest Hits on the way to Michigan: me grimacing in pain and begging for a shorter CD.  I never suspected it would later become my favorite album.  We used to have radio wars right up until he left for the Navy.  By the time he came home, I had surrendered to the classic rock craze thinking we’d finally agree on something, only to discover that he’d started listening to country while he was away.  I guess when siblings fight at home it doesn’t affect how much they miss each other later.

I’m still having trouble believing that it’s real.  Because I hadn’t seen him in 10 months I’d almost adjusted to our irregular,  infrequent communication.  It’s hard to convince myself he won’t come walking in here with a silly grin and some redneck story to tell me.  Reality is getting harder and harder to avoid though, as we acquired his beautiful dog and read over the will.  The part where he left me his music collection brought a fresh wave of pain, so acute I almost couldn’t breathe.  I didn’t know I could hurt this bad.

My purpose for today’s post is to thank everybody who has been my lifeline over these past few weeks.  Without the love and prayers of so many of you I don’t know how I would have kept going.  I don’t regret going to China but being on the other side of the world from my parents during this time was truly agonizing.  I’m infinitely grateful for all of you who called, sent messages, prayed, and hugged me.

"I don't believe an accident of birth makes people sisters or brothers.  It makes them siblings, gives them mutuality of parentage.  Sisterhood and brotherhood is a condition people have to work at."

-Maya Angelou

我喜欢看书

I'm watching the smoke curl from my mosquito-repelling coil, and wishing the insects were as quick to clear the room as the students are from campus.  The University has turned into a mass exodus.  Everybody lit out of here like there was a fire under them, in a rather soothing turn of events for me.  I finished teaching over a week ago, got all my grades completed quickly, and am currently trying to work on something I have yet to master:  patience.

If everything goes as planned I'll leave Sunday afternoon for Beijing, spend a little less than a week, then get ready to go back to America in a gratifyingly small number of days.  Mostly I'm spending my days reflecting on this year and counting the number of seconds until I get to see my sister.  Looking back over this year I can see an uncomfortable number of things I wish I had done differently, but am rewarded by the realization that some things could not have been better.  I know that when I get back, people are going to want me to tell them what my year has been like and I feel frozen in an inability to convey anything real about the vast and unexplainable China.  I can find words, but not sentences they could fit.

I've turned to reading to recuperate, under the illusion that every breach in my life can be patched with a good book.  So far I have not been disappointed.

"We read for those important moments when literature gives us words for what we are: the words for what we did not know we were.  In reading great literature I become a thousand men and yet remain myself.  Like the night sky in the greek poem, I see with a myriad of eyes, but it is still I who see.  Here, as in worship, in love, in moral action, and in knowing, I transcend myself; and am never more myself than when I do."

-C.S. Lewis

糖醋

This is us learning how to cook tang cu li ji

和平公园，二零零八

Yesterday one of my favourite students, Vanilla, invited me to go roller skating with her and some of her classmates.  I haven't been roller skating since I was in about...6th grade so I was pretty stoked.  Unfortunately when we arrived, the place was closed, so we settled for playing in the sprinklers at Peace Park, and eating ice cream in the shade.  We stuck our feet in the Chang Jiang (Long) river and somehow emerged without a disease, so I guess it's not as dirty as it looks.

The relaxing afternoon was followed by one last trip to the Indian Canteen for the year.  Then this morning our Sunday group went to our favourite place in Restaurant Row: Er Ling Ling Ba (2008).  The lovely sisters who run the place agreed to teach us to make some of our regular dishes, so Elizabeth and I stepped into the kitchen (which incidentally is smaller than most people's bathrooms) with our notebooks and camera's in hand.  We watched him create five Chinese wonders and hastily scribbled instructions in the hopes that we can cook them for our families this summer.  We had to occasionally call Emma in to translate, but for the most part managed quite well.  So this summer if you'd like to try some authentic Chinese food expertly cooked by yours truly, give me a call!

"What is patriotism but the love of the food one ate as a child?"

-Lin Yutang